Monday, February 18, 2013

Like sister, like brother

When we began the adoption road to our daughter in China, I thought we would be returning right after she came home, in about 9 months (insert naive giggle), for another Chinese daughter.  But, Proverbs 16:9 played out and proved to be true, as ALL scripture is:
"In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps."

Our quoted wait time for our daughter's referral of 6 months slowly and steadily stretched out to 23 months and during that time we were blessed with another pregnancy, another daughter.  I remember feeling her move and kick in my belly and thinking about my Chinese daughter wondering where she was in her life, if even born yet.  The call finally came that we had been matched with a chubby, round faced baby girl in Chongquing, China.  Much to our delight our daughters would be 3 months apart in age and turn out to be the best of buddies (at least at their current age of 6).

Our lives (and home) were very full with our two sons and two daughters.

Summer, 2010

As time passed, we became increasing convinced that the Lord had another child for us.  Our hearts were broken and eyes opened to the need of the fatherless while in China.  We absolutely had a desire to adopt again.  Not specifically from China, like we had in 2003.  We began to look into different countries, different programs.  During that time, Tim and I both, began to sense a longing for Lindsey to have a sibling that resembled her.  Even at a young age, she would make small comments or questions that led our hearts to feel that another Asian child would benefit her.  Just to clarify, I don't think that all families that adopt internationally need to follow with a second or third adoption of that same race.  We just knew it was right for our family.

We began the paperwork for China and through several twists, turns and heartaches we were led to an agency with a Korean program.  We began the mountain of paperwork, paid the insane amount of fees, started a blog and launched our Minus 1 Project.

Fast forward to April of last year.  Our spunky little Korean son came home.  Another brother to add to expand our circle.  (I'm not ready to say "to complete our circle". :)

We began to notice Lindsey's delight in his dark skin and darker hair.  After only a few days home she told me that she liked how his eyes looked like hers.  Truth is THERE IS BLESSING, ABUNDANT BLESSING, FOLLOWING OBEDIENCE TO THE LORD.  And that blessing flows far beyond the one who is walking in direct obedience, in this case my husband and me.  Our listening, hearing and stepping out in faith has transformed our daughter.

Like two peas in a pod are these two:

 This final and most recent picture is one of my favorites because I think they look so much alike.  As Carson gets older, I really think they are resembling one another more and more.
Let me be very clear on this, I would love them forever and ever regardless of what they looked like but I honestly think that there is a part of my daughter that will heal, cope, grow and embrace life in a different way because of her little brother that looks like her!  Like in all of life, there are many things that we will never quite fully comprehend this side of heaven.

"And then, my sons (and daughters), listen to me:
blessed are those who keep my ways.
Listen to my instruction and be wise;
do not ignore it.
Blessed is the man who listens to me, watching daily at my doors, waiting at my doorway.
For whoever finds me finds life and receives favor from the Lord."
Proverbs 8:32-35

 I do not believe our God forces His will onto His children..."listen to my instruction and be wise".  Those soft calls from the Lord, those gentle pullings and/or nudgings from the Holy Spirit..."do not ignore it".

For this I know, these two children, my son and daughter, born far away from their family and each other, in two different countries, almost four years apart have taught me about life, love and the unbreakable bond that is "family".

Adoption isn't a journey to an unloved or unwanted child but a journey to a child that is fully loved and fully wanted.  If you sense that He is calling your family to step out into this journey, don't miss it.


  1. They are adorable! But I do think kids notice more than we realize. When Mia was just home I had her at school and a little 1st grader walked by who was also Asian and she looked at Mia and kept walking as she said "hey, she looks like me!". I loved that you have adopted two and aren't done :)! Beautiful family!

  2. Oh my heart! What a wonderful post.

    (Loved the pictures!)

  3. Beautiful post and I completely agree! Children from hard places often desire to have as many similarities as possible in their new family. In fact, with our son, he's even found healing in the fact that our dog is adopted too!! Sounds so silly, but he mentions it often (even moreso than that his daddy was adopted)!! :-)

  4. love your post and love the verses, thanks for sharing!