Friday, May 4, 2012

Learning To Let Go

Learning to let go isn't easy.  It involves faith, trust, hope...and many other emotions.

Our newly adopted son is learning this.  And I am learning from him.

Our nightly routine since returning home, about 3 weeks ago, is to lay down with him as he drinks a bottle and falls asleep.  This was his routine with his foster mom in Korea.  This has gone amazing well--thanks, in part, to his four siblings that completely tire him out.  There are many nights that he falls asleep before he finishes his bottle.  We then move him to his crib.

The nights I have laid with him, I have continually tried to hold the bottle for him.  I have always been saddened by the pictures of children in cribs, lining the wall, with their bottles propped up with blankets instead of a loving hand.  I started holding the very end of the bottle while his little, chubby hands gripped the middle.  I would slowly move my hand up until I was touching his fingers.  At that point, he would either roll away from me or just push my hand off, until last night.

As my hand touched his, he let go of his bottle and grasped my thumb with one hand and my pinky with the other.  Tears filled my eyes and joy filled my heart.  He was learning to let go.  He was putting his faith, trust and hope in me.

I thought of my relationship with the Lord.  I thought of the many areas in my life that I don't have faith, trust and hope in Him.  I grip tightly to so many things.  Getting to hold my son's bottle was HUGE for me.  I wnged their lives.  Because it is, in fact, WE who are the "lucky" (don't really care for that term) ones who have been changed by their example of trust, faith, hope and LOVE.

What a complete blessing and pure privilege it is to be a part of an earthly adoption.

as thinking that feeding might be one of the only things that hasn't changed in this little world.  It was the same bottle type (given to us in Korea), filled with the same Korean formula he had received since birth.  He was giving me control over, what I would think was, the last of his comfort.  That takes trust, faith and hope!

What a sweet and very simple picture of our relationship with the Lord.  We can, and should, hold tightly to the Lord off all things and loosely to earthly things.

These are the moments that instantly come to mind when people comment on how lucky Lindsey and Carson are or how WE have cha


  1. Amen! and what a sweet parallel.

  2. What a perfect post today! As you know I'm struggling with having faith and trusting in His plan. Just what I needed to hear. My eyes filled with tears reading this. I can only imagine how your heart burst with joy.

  3. So beautiful! And you are so right, in all aspects!

  4. Like every one has commented before me...beautiful in Sooo many ways!!!

  5. Oh such a beautiful moment. I remember it with both of my girls just like it was yesterday. So happy for both of you:)

  6. Kelly, I can Hardly read one of your posts now without being so touched and tearing up!
    Gods grace on you is amazing!!!